GPS Who? -- Cheers to Summer 2019
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| Cheaha Mountain, Alabama 36258, USA |
If you have read any of my previous post you have probably already noticed that anytime Abbi and I try to do anything, something goes wrong. And boy, did something go wrong this time.
Last week I decided to take a trip back to Jacksonville to see my friends before the Fall semester begins and consumes our lives. While there, Abbi and I decided to take a trip to Mount Cheaha (ya know, mostly for the Instagram pictures). The hike was breathtakingly beautiful and the weather was absolutely perfect for a July hike (thank you, cold front.)
Of course, after we spent twenty minutes hiking and climbing rocks for pictures, we were starved and decided to make the drive to Carrolton, Georgia to grab some lunch. This is where it gets crazy.
Most of you probably already know that I grew up in a small town. So, backroads and dirt roads are like second nature to me. But, when I tell you this GPS was trying to take us off-roading in a Honda Civic, I am NOT lying. There were multiple occasions that this GPS made us take roads made of crushed gravel to get to our destination. Roads that were not even roads.
So, what do we do to fix this situation? Abbi, determined to make this drive, turns off the GPS and tries to get us there from memory. Bad idea, y'all. Approximately fifteen minutes after we lose service and can no longer access the GPS, she realizes that she had passed the turn and no longer knew where we were. So, we were surrounded by cows with absolutely no clue of our location. We had no choice but to admit defeat and turn around to backtrack the fifteen minutes until we found service.
But why am I telling you this? It's simple. This story accurately reflects exactly what I have been going through all summer. I have been at battle with myself and with God. God was simply trying to be my GPS. He was showing me the path and I refused to follow. I gave up when the roads got bumpy and tried to make my own path #neverworks #followthegps.
But, Thank you. Thank you, God, for leading me down the back roads of life and showing me life in ways I had never seen life before. This summer you have shown me how to be humble, how to be a better friend, and opened my eyes to just how blessed I am.
Six months ago I thought I had it all figured out. I had a job that I loved, lot #60 (if you know, you know), a scholarship at the most perfect university, and friends that I absolutely loved. Life was perfect. At least, I thought it was. Then, Summer 2019 came and knocked me off my feet and it has been the absolute best (and worst) experience of my life.
Change is something that I have always feared. I hate change. Even the slightest bit of change makes me uncomfortable. So, you probably have guessed it by now, Summer 2019 has been an emotional rollercoaster ride for me.
On April 23, 2019, I officially loaded up all of my belongings and moved back to my hometown to live with my parents. As cool as my parents are and as much as I love to hang out with them, it was not the easiest adjustment to make. I had spent two years living in Jacksonville, Alabama which is a five hour drive from my parents. This move also meant I was now five hours away from my friends that I had made in college. Therefore, I went from hanging out with my friends in my tiny house until 3 A.M. every night to chilling with my mom until she passed out at 9 P.M. every night. (#Livingitup) April was a period of learning to trust God. Every day I questioned whether moving back was the right move. I had already convinced myself that I was going back to Jacksonville before I had even given God's plan a chance. Looking back now, God knew what he was doing when he sent me back home. Let me fill you in.
Here is my timeline:
MAY-----------------------------------------------------------------
May was a dark period of my life. I was at a very low point. I was so confused and very upset with God. I did not understand why two years ago he sent me to Jacksonville, allowed me to get settled and make friends, and then decide to move me back home. I was hurt. So, I began to rebel. I made terrible decisions and tried to find ways to go back to Jacksonville. I disregarded everything I knew about God. I pushed him aside and pursued MY dreams and MY desires. During this time, I also lost a grandmother. I felt as if everything in my life was going downhill. I lost sight of what was really happening. But, God knows what he is doing. While I was busy ignoring God, he was making moves to help me, not hurt me (#merciful). What I did not realize is the amount of happiness I had found coming back home. I was ignoring the good and just focusing on the bad. I missed my family like crazy while I was living away but now I was getting to spend time with them everyday. I was also rekindling old friendships from high school. Godly friendships, too. Friends that cared about my walk with God.
JUNE----------------------------------------------------------------
June was a breakthrough. I accepted that I was not going back to Jacksonville and that thought did not bother me anymore. I realized I had to trust God. I could not continue idling in this one rut, I had to continue moving forward. So, I accepted TWO jobs, and then quit those TWO jobs because I quickly realized that God did not want me to be in those positions yet. He had other things planned for me. He needed me to be available. Instead, I used June to be available for those around me. I babysat my niece everyday, spent time with my family, and reconnected with my best friend. During this month, I helped plan my brother's wedding and even got to stand beside my best friend as she said yes to the man of her dreams. I even made some new friends during this month.
JULY----------------------------------------------------------------
July came and went by so fast. I stood beside my new sister as she married my brother, loved on Kenna, and took a trip to JACKSONVILLE! OH, and how could I forget! I GOT ACCEPTED TO SOUTH ALABAMA! This month was about healing myself and being there for others. I realized that my purpose for now is to just be available. Be an open ear and a person to hug for those that need it. Show them that God is merciful. If he can forgive me, he can forgive anyone. I also said goodbye to Jacksonville by spending a few days there. It was different. It was no longer home, and I could feel that. Life has changed, but that is okay. I am thankful that I am changed and not the person I was six months ago.
TODAY---------------------------------------------------------------
This summer may have been a whirlwind; but I have embraced it. Even when it may seem like I am off-roading and the roads are too bumpy, God has got my back and will make sure I make it to my destination. I am not perfect and will never be able to boast of perfection, but I sure can boast that my God is PERFECT! And he knows exactly what he is doing! So, cheers to you, Summer 2019. You have been kind.
Change is something that I have always feared. I hate change. Even the slightest bit of change makes me uncomfortable. So, you probably have guessed it by now, Summer 2019 has been an emotional rollercoaster ride for me.
On April 23, 2019, I officially loaded up all of my belongings and moved back to my hometown to live with my parents. As cool as my parents are and as much as I love to hang out with them, it was not the easiest adjustment to make. I had spent two years living in Jacksonville, Alabama which is a five hour drive from my parents. This move also meant I was now five hours away from my friends that I had made in college. Therefore, I went from hanging out with my friends in my tiny house until 3 A.M. every night to chilling with my mom until she passed out at 9 P.M. every night. (#Livingitup) April was a period of learning to trust God. Every day I questioned whether moving back was the right move. I had already convinced myself that I was going back to Jacksonville before I had even given God's plan a chance. Looking back now, God knew what he was doing when he sent me back home. Let me fill you in.Here is my timeline:
MAY-----------------------------------------------------------------
May was a dark period of my life. I was at a very low point. I was so confused and very upset with God. I did not understand why two years ago he sent me to Jacksonville, allowed me to get settled and make friends, and then decide to move me back home. I was hurt. So, I began to rebel. I made terrible decisions and tried to find ways to go back to Jacksonville. I disregarded everything I knew about God. I pushed him aside and pursued MY dreams and MY desires. During this time, I also lost a grandmother. I felt as if everything in my life was going downhill. I lost sight of what was really happening. But, God knows what he is doing. While I was busy ignoring God, he was making moves to help me, not hurt me (#merciful). What I did not realize is the amount of happiness I had found coming back home. I was ignoring the good and just focusing on the bad. I missed my family like crazy while I was living away but now I was getting to spend time with them everyday. I was also rekindling old friendships from high school. Godly friendships, too. Friends that cared about my walk with God.
JUNE----------------------------------------------------------------
June was a breakthrough. I accepted that I was not going back to Jacksonville and that thought did not bother me anymore. I realized I had to trust God. I could not continue idling in this one rut, I had to continue moving forward. So, I accepted TWO jobs, and then quit those TWO jobs because I quickly realized that God did not want me to be in those positions yet. He had other things planned for me. He needed me to be available. Instead, I used June to be available for those around me. I babysat my niece everyday, spent time with my family, and reconnected with my best friend. During this month, I helped plan my brother's wedding and even got to stand beside my best friend as she said yes to the man of her dreams. I even made some new friends during this month.
JULY----------------------------------------------------------------
TODAY---------------------------------------------------------------
This summer may have been a whirlwind; but I have embraced it. Even when it may seem like I am off-roading and the roads are too bumpy, God has got my back and will make sure I make it to my destination. I am not perfect and will never be able to boast of perfection, but I sure can boast that my God is PERFECT! And he knows exactly what he is doing! So, cheers to you, Summer 2019. You have been kind.
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